J.M. Heluk is an affiliate member of The Horror Writers Association (HWA). She has been published alongside top authors like Jack Ketchum, Joe R. Lansdale, Poppy Z. Brite & other Bram Stoker recipients. Her bag is "the anthology" as she is a product of Twilight Zones, 1970's horror mags and Tales from the Crypt.
1). If you could have dinner with any writer in the world, who would it be and what would your dinner conversation consist of?
Far off from the short, machine gun blast sentences of E.B. Strunk & White’s methodology of writing; under-rated, considered wordy and perhaps a bit boorish; the author which one can never find a book of his on any chain bookstore shelf, my dinner guest would be the great Ramsey Campbell. The master of setting a scene, creating mood with such a descriptive flair it forces readers to recall his visions well after the lights go out, I would ask Ramsey for technical tips. He’s just that good.
2). Is there anything you fear worse than death? Tell us why?
For me, there is no greater fear than death; the finality of it, and the utter cold and darkness it brings.
3). If you had to be stranded on a desert island for a year, name the top five books you would want to have with you to pass the time.
My top 5 books would all be blank. Sad to say but if I were stranded on an island for a year, I would finally have the time to write my own novel.
4). Tell us in detail, the scariest nightmare you’ve ever had.
It haunts me still, this recurring dream of a visit to an unfamiliar house on a summer afternoon. There is nothing to be afraid of. I tried to tell myself that but…years later…I have yet to be convinced.
I am upstairs on the second floor landing, peering into a bedroom.
This bedroom has a simple, old world elegance not often found these days. It is a bright, clean place and the curtains, all crisp lace, softly drift in on an amniotic breeze. There is a poster bed with carved pineapple finials; two matching night stands, a large Eastlake dresser topped by a scrolled pediment and wide-plank wood floors. It looks so inviting. The bed is flanked by these two windows. Rustling curtains give glimpses of blue sky beyond. It’s quiet. Lay down and sleep, I think, this is a fine place.
I find myself moving into the room, but curiously slow, cautiously. My trepidation feels so foolish, even in a sleep state. But in this place, standing at the foot of the bed, I am overtaken by a great sobering terror. Something unseen is coming…I can feel it, tumbling and spilling forth from some far darker place. Then it is here, behind me, spoiling this sunshiny place with its filth. I cannot face it. Cannot comprehend it. I can only feel its awful presence and the entire tone of the room shifts into menace. The curtains still blow, white clouds drift. I am conflicted by the illusion of innocence and struggle to wake, for I know if I do not, something will happen here, something so horrible I am unable to confront it, even as I sleep. I must wake up. I must and I know it. This is not an ordinary bedroom of lace curtains and antique finery. And this is no beautiful day. This is pure hell.
5). If the world were over run with zombies, where would you seek safety and what worldly possessions would you require to remain sane?
Interestingly enough, this is something I have given a great deal of thought to, and, more than once in my life. So much so, a friend gave me the book, The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks. I would be lying if I said I hadn’t studied it as if this situation could really happen. My first thought would be to go out to the ocean on some house boat with plenty of supplies. But, supplies run out. Eventually you’d have to dock to replenish and we all know that comes with a great risk of being consumed. Plus, since Zombies are dead, they do not require air. Therefore I am sure they’d be able to travel underwater for great distances.
So, I believe the safest place would be in some wild, mountainous, unpopulated region. I would need a fortress, a clear 360* vantage point an observatory tower and plenty of food. This must be far from society, away from ancient burial grounds or obviously, fresh ones. The only worldly possession’s I’d need would be weaponry. Without it there would be no sanity. So I guess I’d be in the Hills of West Virginia.
6). What is your favorite song from the seventies and why?
Cheap Trick…I Want you to Want Me. It’s just catchy.
7). If you could be a kid for one day back in the era where you grew up, what would you spend the afternoon doing?
The romantic in me would seek out my other half, my better half, a wonderful man named Robert who I am still so deeply in love with. I would spend the day in his company admiring him as a child.
The realist in me would return to that lazy summer afternoon on Central School’s playground where I had my first smoke; a bent and battered Winston, and I’d punch Kelaine Mack square in the face for clipping it from her stepfather.
8). What was the last concert you attended; was it worth the price of admission? Why?
Wildwood New Jersey, June, 2007. Beetles puttered through the air like small buzzing crafts. The sun shrank behind the waves and there, out on the boardwalk, fifty dollars was spent on two tickets. I treated myself and my mother to a night of Polkafest; 7 hours of non-stop Polka music, beer, food, dancing and the kind of laughing that’ll be remembered when I am old and gray. Oh yes, it was worth it.
9). You have one day to be invisible, where do you spend it?
I have given this Invisibility thing nearly as much thought as the zombie question. I could lie and say I’d use my newly found power for something noble, like fighting crime or something. Real answer: I would creep into the homes of people I despise to A) watch every vile thing they do when they think they’re alone and B) Move objects around to freak them out.
Wouldn’t everyone do that?
10). You have a new President, what are your thoughts for the future?
I am a true poptomist. I coined that phrase, too.
I am optimistic that President Obama will move this country back into a more favorable position on the world stage, one where we can be admired when we do great deeds and be respected as we once were. I voted for the man.
Unfortunately, I am also pessimistic. Two things frighten me. Ignorance and fanatical religion. Find one and the other is not far behind. Respected, admired by millions. A man of peace. And, he’s black. That bothers some deeply. I can only pray. God help us...
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